Everyone has something they fear. For some it’s sharks, bugs, or heights. For me, it’s that my almost-2 year old daughter would pull out her feeding tube. Recently, I learned a very valuable lesson when it comes to listening to the Holy Spirit. About a month ago “something,” told me to order an extra mickey button/feeding tube for my daughter. Little did I know that that “something” was God strategically preparing me for a head to head battle with my greatest fear.
I noticed the baby’s feeding button looked loose and I planned on changing it at the doctors office. As I showed the doctor her loose button he said, “Don’t worry, she’ll be fine.” I told him I had an extra one in the car, but I allowed his words to rationalize my thoughts and silence my spirit. The next day I had an urge to drive to my mother’s house in Hollywood at night. It was easier to drive long distances when the baby fell asleep in the car. My mom lives right by Joe Dimaggios Children’s Hospital, the place my family and I spent 2 months when my daughter was born. It is an excellent facility that we knew very well.
The next morning I was awakened and confronted with my biggest fear. I felt , & thinking it was the baby’s pamper, I went to change her and saw the mickey button & feeding extension off to the side. The tiny balloon that holds it in place had burst. For the first time I saw my daughters stomach as it will be one day, tube free. I was in shock, but in total peace. I knew at that moment everything was in God’s control. I covered the wound knowing we had to get to the hospital fast. As I trace back all the strategic steps I see how God was urging me all along. He knew it was going to happen and had I insisted at the doctor’s office, we wouldn’t have had to rush to the hospital that early morning. Needless to say, after a couple of hours & some heart-wrenching pain, Sofia was OK. The hole had almost closed, but they got it just in time. It was a miracle we were so close, but then again it wasn’t, it was God’s plan. Hospitals don’t provide you with her special medical equipment, so perfectly, as God had planned it, that extra kit came in handy. To add to God’s signature over this situation, I happened to be reading about the Spirit and mind and how one should always honor the Spirit over the mind. It seems like common sense, but we struggle with decisions everyday. God tells us to do something and our mind starts thinking and before you know it, we’ve rationalized our way out of it. This was a tremendous testimony for me and I pray the next time the Spirit speaks, we can not only hear, but obey! It’s also comforting to know that even if we miss it, God is merciful to keep talking and does not give up on us.
“And he said, Go forth, and stand upon the mount before the Lord. And, behold, the Lord passed by, and a great and strong wind rent the mountains, and brake in pieces the rocks before the Lord; but the Lord was not in the wind: and after the wind an earthquake; but the Lord was not in the earthquake: And after the earthquake a fire; but the Lord was not in the fire: and after the fire a still small voice.”1 Kings 19:11,12
